This Email is a Gift
There is no paywall
I am early on in what I imagine will be weeks of processing this email that hit my inbox this morning. This is from Jake Bell’s wonderful newsletter Who Do You Know.
If anyone wants to chat on this to help me process, I’d love to get a chat thread going on Substack. Starter questions & thoughts:
Is he right and does he speak for many people…probably?
Why do I feel this says so much that is wonderful and horrible about restaurants and the people who go to them, which is a lot of us.
I have obsessed over Hillstone for 20+ years and just went for the first time in November- why did it take me so long?
Thank you and YOU’RE WELCOME.
This first few weeks of 2025, I’ve been experimenting with style of dining.
I’m at a point in my life where I do not cook.
I haven’t even made a cup of coffee at my apartment in 3 months.
I eat every single meal out of the house.
Largely, these meals are ‘slop bowls’
The type of fast-casual make-you-own-bowl meals that have become the quintessential dietary staple for thousands of bros, just like me, working long hours at an office in New York City.
Chipotle. Sweetgreen. Cava. Rinse. Wash. Repeat.
This routine is one of function and pure utilitarianism.
But enjoying a long meal at a great restaurant is one of my favorite things to do.
So on Saturday, the one day I have the time to hit a restaurant, I want it to be a guaranteed success.
I don’t want to take a risk on an experimental Peruvian wine bar in Ridgewood where the whole staff hates you.
I don’t want to make a reservation 4 months out for place that just blew up on TikTok.
And I don’t want to spend $36 on some mid crudo and stale bread in the Lower East Side.
Here’s what I am looking for—
Table availability
Fast, pro staff
Great food
Big, dark room
Martinis
And for me, I’ve found a new level of restaurant serenity by experiencing restaurant ego-death.
I don’t care about signaling my taste on Beli anymore.
I want to eat at Hillstone. Nobu. Carbone. Buddakan. Catch.
So now every Saturday I hit a new basic, gauche, douchey restaurant.
The types of place people have their birthday parties at.
And I’ve never been happier.
Here are a few of my favorite recent dishes—
French Dip, Hillstone
I love Hillstone because it feels like a nicest restaurant at a mall. Like I should be dining with several Saks Fifth Ave bags sitting in the booth with me. The menu has no curveballs or big swings, just classic staples done pretty well. You can turn your mind off and before you know it you’re eating artichoke dip and shrimp cocktail. It’s like a slow dream. My favorite thing on the menu is the French Dip. This shit is so fire. Hillstone is known as Houston’s in most part of the country and they have 37 locations now. They’re doing something right.
Yellowtail Sashimi w Jalapeno, Nobu
When I want sushi I don’t bother trying to get a reservation at a 21-course omakase. I just give in and go to Nobu. Similarly, there are Nobu’s all over the world, which is a testament to their consistency. I order like a table of girls on Spring Break in Miami. I get the crispy rice with spicy tuna, the miso black cod, lobster rolls, rock shrimp and most importantly the yellowtail sashimi with jalapeno. This is a perfect bite of salt and spice that really melts in your mouth.
Dim Sum Tower, Buddakan
Perhaps the most ostentatious of the basic restaurants I’m mentioning is Buddakan. It’s sprawling, thumping with club-like music, and decorated with art that “marries the serenity of Asia with the flamboyance of 16th-century Paris." e.g. there are tons of bacchanal-esque paintings adorning the walls. They have a communal dining table in the main room that makes you feel like you’re at Church of Golden Goose. I am fond of the Dim Sum for two which comes out served on a fun little tower.
These restaurants, albeit a bit basic, are hits amongst the masses because they are actually really good. The spaces are vibey, the staff is professional and kind, and the food is dependably pretty good.
No my mind is not blown away by new avant garde culinary delicacies on a weekly basis.
But that’s okay. I think I am on the whole having a significantly better dining experience than most.
The bliss of basic can feel so good if you let it.
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